Sunday, July 5, 2009

The end of March 17th 2009

I knew the minute I would go into the house it would be the last time things would be "normal". When I walked in the house my husband was sitting on the couch and my sister was sitting on the floor up against the wall. I walked over to the recliner that faced both of them and just starred at them both. What was I supposed to say? My sister just said my husband did this to her. I started with my sister. I said Becky why did you say this happen!! My sister just starred at me and said because it did, Monica! At that time my husband started screaming at my sister and said your full of shit you know this is not true. I felt like I was stuck in the middle of a hurricane. I looked at my husband and said DID YOU DO THIS. He told me, Monica! You know I wouldn't do that!.

My sister just started balling and laid her head in her hands and said BOBBY YOU KNOW THIS Is TRUE JUST ADMIT IT!! I looked at my husband and said, DID YOU MOLEST MY SISTER!! of course this was an ongoing battle of yes he did and no I didn't. I felt like I was getting nowhere fast. I told my husband who do I believe, I told him," you have lied to me so much and cheated on me and even when proof was in hand, and my sister is known for lying to everyone to get what she wants". An argument started between my husband and my sister and it was a "No I didn't and yes you did argument", my sister was screaming at my husband saying just tell my sister you did it and I will tell the authorities you didn't do it but I want you to tell my sister you did. My husband told me "believe your sister then" so I said OK, and he replied and said "I am going to walk off into the desert and die".

I remember I walked up to the gas station and as I was walking I called my best friend, and told her what was going on and I was hysterical. When I got back I stayed on the phone with her and I didn't want to go back into the house. Finally I walked in and we all were arguing again. My husband telling my sister that she has ruined every ones life and none of the kids were going to love her again if things got anymore out of hand. I couldn't handle the crap anymore, this "he said she said", game was really killing me.

I remember this like yesterday, I was standing next to the computer and my sister was to my left and my husband to my right, I was begging for someone to tell me the damn truth and I had enough so at this time I was pretty irate with them both. Neither of them would crack! They each stuck to their own stories! I felt like Neve Cample in the movie Scream, trying to decide who is the ghost face murderer in the story.

I finally got on the phone with my mom after hours of trying to get a hold of her and she was in as much disbelief as me and everyone else. She also agreed that there was no way my husband did this and that my sister was just looking for reason to go home. She came up with an idea of having my husband and my sister alone in a room and my husband record the conversation and so my husband did this. He went into the kitchen and started asking my sister why she was lying and she still said she wasn't, even when they were alone. My husband said, "Becky, its just me and you stop lying, and what I was able to make out of the recorded conversation was my sister saying FINE BOBBY, I WILL JUST SAY I'M LYING!. I was in the car at the time and I heard the screen door open and my sister came out threw her hands in the air and said, "Monica I'm Lying", and she went back into the house.

After I went into the house again, I noticed my sister was upstairs and my husband was in the living room. I wasn't sure what to say to anyone. I know that me and my husband stayed up for hours talking about what had just happen. As I was worried to hell and back as to what was going to happen, and how awkward tomorrow was going to be my husband fell asleep. I thought to myself what the hell! how can he fall asleep with this crap happening. At that time I had called my sister downstairs and we sat on the steps and talked about what was going on. I told her I had called the MP's (military police) on my husband and they are coming for him. She started crying and said, "No, Monica why did you do that?" I told her because if this was true he needed to go to prison. She told me it was true but she didn't want to get him into trouble and she didn't want her nieces to think she is the one to make their daddy go to jail. My plan back fired on me once again, I figured if I told her that she would of finally said she was lying, but she didn't. She starte telling me about one of the times the molest had happen and what he did to her, I was getting sick to my stomach by her story and I said, "No Becky, this isn't true, and you know it". She kept saying "Monica it is true, I would never do this to you or my nieces if it wasn't" this was a very long confusing conversation that seemed to last for hours. I am not sure how I went to sleep that night or what time I did eventually fall asleep, but I did and the next day started the day of my enormous change of life, an emotional roller coaster ride of anger, denial, acceptance and be continued


When I went outside to confront the lady who we thought turned my husband in for allegations, I noticed her big black shiny SUV at the end of the cul-de-sac about ready to head in my direction. When she saw me standing in the middle of the road she sped up. She did stop and the first thing out of her mouth was, "I'm so sorry, I had to do something". I said, So it was you who called CPS, and she said yes. At that time I seriously wanted to yank her out of the car and beat her to the ground. I started screaming at her asking her, do you know what you have done! She asked me to calm down and hear her out. While all this is going on my sister and husband stayed in the house. She told me that my sister and her got into a conversation about child molesting. She said my sister told her that she has been molested. They asked her who she was molested by and she didnt say. The mother of the friend told me that both her and her daughter asked if it was my husband who did it and my sister started crying and shook her head yes. I told them that they were full of shit and so was my sister, because she was in desperate need to go home to her boyfriend, and afraid of the possibility she would be moving to Germany with us if my husband re-enlisted.

The mother, Marybell, asked me an odd question, she said Monica think really hard do you think there is a possibility that something happen between them. At that point I said no no no way, my husband would NEVER do something like this. She said she wasnt sure because my sister was crying so much and was hessitant in telling her who it was that molested her. At that point I started screaming my sisters name, yelling at her to get her ass to the car and tell marybell what she just told me, and that was that her story was not true. So when she came out Marybell told her to tell me exactly what she told her and her daughter. At that point her daughter, my sisters friend popped out of the back seat and said yes please tell your sister exactly what you told us! I looked at my sister and said WELL!!, DID THIS HAPPEN OR NOT!! My sister kept looking back and forth to both of us, just then my husband came out and stood next to us and I told him what was going on. Marybell didnt speak to my husband and my husband kept telling my sister to tell them what she told us. At that point no one other then my sister seemed to be around me. Again I asked her DID THIS HAPPEN!! she looked at me then my husband and her eyes filled up with tears and she shook her head yes. It was like I was shot in the stomach and my flesh was crawling. She ran into the house and my husband ran inside with her. I stood outside in absolute shock and disbeliefe I looked at marybell and said she is lying, she wants to go home. Marybell said she was going to buy my sister a camcordr so my sister could record the next time something happen but my sister refused. I finally told her ok this is bullshit and I ran into the house after my sister......... (to be continued)

Friday, July 3, 2009



March 17th 2009

Yep, Im heading back into time, I need my blog to get some attention I will get to why the attention is needed at the end of this blog book.

March 17th well started out good, it was a normal day my 14 year old sister we had custody of went to school our 9 year old wen to school and my husband put on his United States Army uniform. He went to work and I stayed home and started my everyday job of being a house wife. and mother to our youngest two girls ages 1 and 2 (at the time).

I had cleaned house fed them breakfast and started to sit down at the computer to start relaxing and enjoying my brief surf on the net, when I get a knock on my door. This was unsual since I live on a military post and I know no one, so I was excited. When I got to the door and answered it there were two ladies standing there, professionally dressed.

They asked me if I was who I am and of course I said yes, then they asked me if my sister was who she is and I said yeah why what did she do. My sister came to live with us because she had some major problems at home and was heading down the wrong road so we decided to step in and help. Well the women told me that its not my sister who had the problem, it was my husband. These people were from CPS (child protective service) and said they had a report my husband has been having sex with my sister!

Yeah, my day went to hell, I almost hit the floor I just about passed out. I asked if I could call my husband and have him come home since these allegations were on him. They said I could. As I was trying to call my husband with my hands shaking and my mind turning in all directions, I thought how am I going to ask him to come home, how will I tell him these people are here?....I remember this conversation to this day...He answered the phone like he always did, "Hello Babe" I said hey "Bobby, what are you doing" as I am trying to figure this out how to tell him that I have these people in my home. He told me he was sitting in a humvee and was waiting to get lucnh. So finally I said you need to get home NOW, He asked why whats wrong, so I told him, he said WHAT!. Finally he hung up the phone and got here in 5 min. He walked in and said "WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!" The woman told him the same thing she told me, my husband got irate and walked outside, the CPS lady told him thats not how an innocent person acts. As I was sitting there with my head jumbled up and into pieces, CPs told me they were going to interview my sister at school and someone will get back to me. When they left my husband and his superior were still here. My husband is pacing back and forth and said he knows who turned him in for false allegations, he said it was my sisters friend because when she came to the door that morning to pick up my sister she acted weird and not herself. Well my husbands superior left and my husband stayed home. We were in the house and he couldnt sit still, I followed him all over the house and I remember this like a pictured burned into my mind, he jumped up on the counter in front of our microwave and his eyes filled up with tears, first time I seen my husband cry in years. He said "how could she do this to me". I told him not to worry about it because if its not true she going to say its not true. So I finally calmed him down and told him she would be home from school in about an hour in a half. So as we waited I tried calling my mom and anyone else I could think of.

Finally as time was getting closer my husband stated getting anxious, he was pacing back and fourth and wanted to meet her outside as she got off the bus. I tried to keep him in the house but he insisted on going outside. So I sat in the chair and waited to see them walk up to the house finally I saw our neighbor girl who is friends with my sister walk into her house so I knew she had to be close. I walked outside and my husband and her were walking up to the house together. We all walked inside and I asked her what this crap was about, and she said "I dont know, I was interviewed by CPS and I told them it wasnt true." So some sense of reliefe was lifted until I noticed the lady who called CPS was circling my house and I couldnt handle it anymore and I went outside to confront her..................(blog continued latter)